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Wednesday, March 2, 2011

You Are Not So Great, It's Not About The Money and Other Lies



Heya Blogfans!


So I was doing the domestic thing this morning and got as far as picking up this weird little slip of paper that read:


You are 
not so
Great,
XXXX XXXXX 


It had been folded carefully in half then in half again- and signed. 


I don't recognize the handwriting or the name. I'm positive that the kid wasn't quoting Golda Meir (as in "Don't be humble, you're not that great") And what kind of kid gives, never mind signs and punctuates a note like that? 


It's a telling statement though because, in feeling the need to inform my son or daughter that they are not in fact all that great, what they're really saying is " I see you as being better than I am and I want to make you feel bad because you remind me I'm not all that great myself."


I had a law professor who imparted these immortal words of wisdom: "When someone says 'it's not about the money' it is always about the money." 


 I listen for phrases like this because people almost always tell you so much more about themselves than they realize. These are phrases of insecurity or pure hubris (the bad kind- not the subtle kind.) "It's not about the money" usually means "I don't want it to be about the money" or "I don't want you to know that I believe it's all about the money and you're so stupid that you'll believe me- sucka."   


Listen to what people mean instead of what they say- it adds a whole new dimension to conversation. 


You are
not so
Great.


And don't you forget it either because if my puny note can knock you down you really aren't all that great and I've won.


Bah.


I learned another phrase in one of my law classes


Res ipsa loquitur


The facts speak for themselves.


Always. 


It's just hard to spot the facts through the bullshit sometimes.


Until next time,
S.H.







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